Throughout the grief journey there will be different places your heart and mind will drift when a reminder of your loved one appears. While walking out of my bathroom one particular day I noticed a sweatshirt hanging on the back of the door. This sweatshirt belonged to my brother. My brother has been gone from earth for 5 years and 8 months. I gave his sweatshirt to my husband because they happen to be the same size. Often I see it lying around and it ALWAYS brings my brother into remembrance. There is another particular item of clothing that I still have of his that hangs in my closet. It’s a grey long sleeve shirt. I remember giving him hugs and feeling the softness on my cheek from this shirt. It’s made of a soft material and brings such comfort. The grey shirt is tucked back in my closet among the seasonal items and I only come across it every so often. When I do, I stop, reflect, and am reminded again of his presence on earth.
These little reminders produce different emotions and thoughts depending on where you are in your grief journey. Today, it is heartache and longing for his presence on earth. In the past, anger, and next month it may elicit a completely different emotion. I have learned through this journey that it is important to acknowledge these reminders and my reaction to them. Reminders give insight into where you are in your grief journey. They allow oneself to be aware in the grief journey. I have learned if I do not allow myself to sit in these moments, and reflect on them for a time, I will find myself depleted.
Time on earth with a lost loved one has many moments of heartache and sorrow. The world can appear differently depending on the lens (or stage of grief) you are experiencing. If I allow no time to be in these moments of grief, I do a disservice to my lost loved one. My denial of heartache and sorrow dismisses the true depth of love I have for them.
Have you lost a loved one? What reminders do you stumble upon in your day to day life? How do you take time to reflect on their life and acknowledge your grief in these moments? Share with me in the comments below.
Much Love to You in Your Journey,